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So I found someone's phone. This is what happened.

Two weeks after e-mailing Helen about finding her phone, she responds with weird demands.

Unfortunately for her, the author of Fakebook is not someone you want to provoke over the internet.

This is the actual e-mail chain between Helen and myself, and it is the most fun I've ever had.


Date: Sat, Jun 29, 2013 at 7:43 PM

From: Helen
To: Helen
Subject: I found your phone

Hi Helen,

I found your iPhone today downtown—I figured e-mailing you from your phone made the most sense to get in touch with you. Please e-mail at dave@XXXXX.com so we can coordinate its return.

-Dave



Date: Fri, Jul 8, 2013 at 10:07 AM

From: Helen
To: Helen
Subject: Re: I found your phone

Hi Helen,

It's been over a week, and I just wanted to try one more time to make contact with you. I found your phone in Chinatown. Let me know if you want it. E-mail me at dave@XXXX.com.



Date: Fri, Jul 13, 2013 at 4:29 PM

From: Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Iphone

Hi, I saw your message that you found my iPhone, please send me some pictures of my iPhone so I know that this isn't a prank or anything like that. Send me the pictures of how the iPhone looks like, the screen saver, and whats on the iPhone. I have a few question for you to answer; When did you find the iPhone and where? Please reply back as soon as possible! Thank you!

~helen~



Date: Saturday, Jul 13, 2013 at 5:03 PM

From: Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Iphone

I found the phone downtown 2 weeks ago. Below is the phone. Do you live in the city? You can meet me in a coffee shop. If not, I'll mail it to you.

-Dave



Date: Saturday, Jul 13, 2013 at 5:52 PM

From: Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Iphone

When are you gonna ship it and are you gonna make it a fast mail?

~helen~



Date: Saturday, Jul 13, 2013 at 6:04 PM

From: Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Iphone

Are you going to make it fast mail? (Delivered in 24 hours)

~helen~



Date: Saturday, Jul 13, 2013 at 6:24 PM

From: Dave Cicrelli
To: Helen
Subject: Iphone

Of course I'm not going to over-night it. That is expensive.

Do you live in the city? If so we can meet at a coffee shop tomorrow. Otherwise, tell me where to send it and I'll send it.

-Dave



Date: Sat, Jul 13, 2013 at 8:58 PM

From: Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Iphone

Can you send the phone in one of these envelope thank you so much cause it could just be in my mail box thank u so much

I live at XXXX XXst, Brooklyn NY 11219 I thank u so much

~helen~



Date: Sun, Jul 14, 2013 at 9:38 AM

From: Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Iphone

Or you can send it however u like if you don't have those envelopes thank u

~helen~



Date: Sun, Jul 14, 2013 at 5:43 PM

From: Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Iphone

Please tell me when you send my iPhone. Thanks!

~helen~



Date: Mon, Jul 15, 2013 at 1:19 PM

From: Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Iphone

Did you send my Iphone yet? Please reply back soon :)

~helen~



Date: Thu, Jul 18, 2013 at 12:17 PM

From: Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Iphone

Hi, did you send my iPhone yet, please reply, I'm getting worried. Thanks.

~helen~



Date: Sat, Jul 20, 2013 at 7:37 AM

From: Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Important, MUST read.

Thank you for giving my iPhone back, (I just received it in the mail yesterday.) But why did you put a password on it? What's the password?

~helen~



Date: Sat, Jul 20, 2013 at 9:38 AM

From: Dave Cicirelli
To: Helen
Subject: Re: Important, MUST read.

I'm so glad the phone made it to you safely. I get nervous mailing anything valuable through the mail. Thank goodness it made it to you, and wasn't stolen by a crooked mail man. That's why I put a password on the phone...if it fell into the wrong hands, they could have access to all your personal information. Not everyone is as good a person as me!!! Lol. :) :)

But I just want to make sure it's the right phone or this isn't a prank before I email you the password. Can you send me a picture of the phone with the wallpaper displayed?

Thank you so much!!! And I'm so happy it got to you!!!

-Dave



Date: Sat, Jul 20, 2013 at 10:35 AM

From:Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Re: Important, MUST read.

Ohmygod, you had my worried!

Well, here's the thing, i can't really send you the wallpaper, since I don't have a webcAM

to take the photo. But you can just ask me any questions you want about the iPhone, and I can answer it .

~helen~



Date: Sat, Jul 20, 2013 at 10:36 AM

From:Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Re: Important, MUST read.

Oh, and I also have a question, homecome there's 20% batteries left? Didn't you charge it, and it had like 80% ?

~helen~



Date: Sat, Jul 20, 2013 at 11:52 AM

From:Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Re: Important, MUST read.

Please reply back! I really truly have my iPhone back, and this isn't a prank or anything.

I can't send you the picture, but I can describe it.

It has a pink background with a picture of pink coffee with polka dots, and it has 3 sugar cubs. Also, there's a very small person, and she's next to the coffee cup holding a pink spoon, and I think she's stirring the coffee, and she's saying " I @#60;3 Cafe. "

Please reply back, and PLEASE send the password!

~helen~



Date: Sat, Jul 20, 2013 at 2:56 PM

From:Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Re: Important, MUST read.

Okay here's the phone.

Sorry for the bad quality



Date: Sat, Jul 20, 2013 at 3:53 PM

From:Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Re: Important, MUST read.

Here's another one :)



Date: Sat, Jul 20, 2013 at 3:54 PM

From:Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Re: Important, MUST read.

Do you need another one to prove that its'nt a prank or something :)



Date: Sat, Jul 20, 2013 at 6:05 PM

From:Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Re: Important, MUST read.

Do you want me to take a photo of the envelope?



Date: Sun, Jul 21, 2013 at 7:45 AM

From:Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: PROVE

See? Here's my wallpaper. So this isn't a prank or anything . Now please give me the password.



Date: Sun, Jul 21, 2013 at 9:16 AM

From:Dave Cicirelli
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Re: PROVE

Hey!

Sorry I haven't been replying to e-mail. I forgot to charge my phone yesterday.



Date: Sun, Jul 21, 2013 at 9:43 AM

From:Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Re: PROVE

Can you just PLEASE give me the password?



Date: Sun, Jul 21, 2013 at 11:45 AM

From:Dave Cicirelli
To: Helen
Subject: Re: PROVE

Oh gosh, I'm so forgetful. LOL. I must be driving you CRAZY!!!

That's definitely the phone I mailed! Thank goodness. I'm happy to unlock it for you.

Mail it back to me any time, and I'll put in the password for you. And I promise to charge it to 100% for you this time!!!

Thanks so much!!!



Date: Sun, Jul 21, 2013 at 12:45 PM

From:Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Re: PROVE

Wait, what? You want me to mail my iPhone back to you?

Not to be mean or anything, but are you serious?



Date: Sun, Jul 21, 2013 at 1:35 PM

From:Dave Cicirelli
To: Helen
Subject: Re: PROVE

…well, how else can I unlock your phone? Please tell me? I'm really trying to be helpful. I'm sorry if I upset you somehow. :(

Sent from my iPhone



Date: Sun, Jul 21, 2013 at 2:29 PM

From:Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Re: PROVE

you can just give me the password



Date: Sun, Jul 21, 2013 at 6:33 PM

From:Dave Cicirelli
To: Helen
Subject: Re: PROVE

Whaaaaaat!!!!

Email a password?!?! Are you crazy?! (0.0)

That's so unsafe. There could be hackers anywhere!!!

I really want to help, but I want to be safe as well. I think the best idea is to send it back to me, and I'll unlock it.

Sent from my iPhone



Date: Mon, Jul 22, 2013 at 9:19 AM

From:Helen
To: Dave Cicirelli
Subject: Re: PROVE

There's not going to be any hackers, how can there even be hackers?

Just please email me the password, if jave t send to you, then you're gonna unlock it, and then send it back to me, it's going to take a whole week to finish that.

But if you just email me the password then i'll only take a couple of hours. Besides there's no hackers here.

If you're not going to tell me the password, then I'll just have to go to a computer store, and they're going to jailbreak it or something.



Date: Mon, Jul 22, 2013 at 11:40 AM

From:Dave Cicirelli
To: Helen
Subject: Re: PROVE

First of all, there are hackers EVERYWHERE! Haven't you seen the movie "The Net" starring Sandra Bullock?!

I'm really upset right now. I try and do the right thing, and even thought for a moment I made a new friend… and then you keep pressuring me to e-mail passwords, even though we both know how unsafe that is. And now you're talking about breaking out of prison!?!?!?! Who AM

I dealing with?

I will mail you the password in an envelope like this one…even though you hurt my feelings.

Helen stopped replying.

Here password was "0-0-0-0". True to my word, I placed this in the mail Tuesday afternoon—a week after I first mailed the phone, and three weeks after I found it.

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